We came into the world without any abilities. We didn’t know anything, we didn’t understand anything, we couldn’t express ourselves, we couldn’t choose or make decisions, we couldn’t sing, we couldn’t think and plan and create. We only had two things: infinite ability to learn anything, and infinite potential of qualities that would have to be developed in the years to come.
When we are angry we are sure
that we are better
that we are more right
that we are stronger
but it is actually an illusion.
Every day we learned something new: a new insight, a new idea, new knowledge. And each new thing we learned expanded our consciousness more and more. It was enough for us to be who we are today, because who we are today is the sum of everything we’ve learned up to this day. But everything we have learned up to this day is not enough for us to be who we are meant to be from now on.
Each of us is meant to be as beautiful and as smart as we possibly can, and each one of us can be much more beautiful and smart than he or she is today. But what has to change within us so that we will be the beautiful and smart people we are meant to be?
What needs to change is all those things that get in our way of being beautiful and smart. And it is very easy to narrow down this list of things: we are not beautiful and not smart when we are focused only on ourselves, when we are angry and when we fight.
What Do We Look Like When We Are Self-Involved?
When we are self-involved we are focused only on our own needs, only our wants, only on our convenience and our own rights. Our main motive is searching for personal benefit, and we feel that we deserve, that we are owed, and that we have the right to get everything we want.
But when we are self-involved we are shut off not only from others but also from ourselves, and we see in ourselves only what we wish to see. That is the reason why we never know how negative we can be, and that is the reason why we don’t fix our negative sides.
Maybe we think that we are protecting our opinions, our wants and our interests. But there is no greater stupidity than this, because we return and find ourselves in a battle with other people who have other wants, different opinions and other interests. You will surely agree that there is no wisdom, or any beauty to that.
What Do We Look Like When We Are Angry?
When we are angry we try to force someone else to feel bad, we project the responsibility for our own mistakes onto someone else, we are convinced that someone else is guilty for our difficulties, and we are certain that we are innocent victims.
When we are angry we are sure that we are better, more justified and have better understanding, and we cannot accept opinions other than our own.
When we are angry we delude ourselves that we are strong and in control, and we don’t sense how little control we have.
In moments of anger we see an enemy in anyone who thinks differently than us, and we are able to tell them the most hurtful things even if we destroy the things most important to us in the process.
When we are angry we are tyrannical and childish and we create wars in which there are no winners and no gainers. And needless to say, there is nothing beautiful or wise in us in moments of anger.
What Do We Look Like in Moments of Disputes?
In moments of disputes we are like a wounded animal trying to find relief to its pain by causing someone else pain.
In moments of disputes we are aggressive and cruel, and we are very far away from all the values we hold high: acceptance empathy, sharing, decency, equality and mutual understanding.
In moments of disputes we prove that we have not learned anything about dialogue and discussion, and that we only know how to force our opinion, and shout out our arguments without listening to the other’s distress.
In moments of disputes we remember only what we have sacrificed, and we completely forget what the other has done for us.
It is difficult to find a spark of wisdom in people caught in a dispute, and there is certainly no beauty in two people baring teeth and sharpening their fingernails.
Being Beautiful and Smart Can Be Learned
We have so much to learn in order to be those beautiful and smart creatures we are destined to be. Why did we ever stop learning? Why did we stop growing? Why did we stop changing?
Learning is the beginning of abundance. Learning is the beginning of spiritual health. Learning is the beginning of a valuable life. Learning is the beginning of good relationships. Every change, every improvement, every correction begins with learning. Learning is the beginning of all beginnings. And who we are in the future, will be the sum of the learning we gift ourselves with.